| Teen Bullying - Punishment for Teenagers Who Bully |
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In this day and age, there are a lot of ways teens can get bullied. Teen bullying is not just limited to physical and verbal abuse anymore. With more and more teens becoming internet savvy these days, all it takes is a few clicks of the mouse to post an embarassing photo, video or status update that can potentially do more damage to a teen than a shove down the hallway. But what happens when you get a call from a school administrator who informs you that your teen has been bullying other children at school? Parents who find out about their teen's aggression towards other children are often faced with a barrage of emotions. Some parents feel embarrassed and ashamed that they somehow didn't raise their child well enough or they weren't able to control their children's violent streak. Many parents, however, are unwilling to accept or admit that their children have a problem. Maybe the school got it wrong, surely it can't be your kid who inflicts harm on other children? Or maybe other kids are just overreacting? Why Do Teen Bullies Need Discipline? Some parents may even be hesitant to admit that their children's bullying is something to be punished and dealt with severely. These parents think that the real problem is if their children are at the receiving end of bullying. Why do parents need to give careful consideration about punishment for teenagers who bully? It's mainly because bullies themselves are affected by their own actions. They tend to develop a healthy disrespect for authority figures, have poor social skills, perform poorly in school, and generally just gets into more trouble as time passes by. When bullies grow up, they have a hard time relating to other people and developing meaningful relationships with others. Typically, teen bullies are more popular while they are young but their social group thins out as they grow older and wield less control over the other children around them. They also tend to be more depressive and more likely to abuse substances. Bullying is a bad pattern that needs to be broken as early as possible. If parents don't address this pattern early, their teens will end up bullying people at home, at work, etc. How Do You Handle Teenagers Who Bully? 1. Make the punishment fit the crime - Parents who think of punishment for teenagers who bully other children often react out of anger. Bullies can handle the tough talk. Most actually thrive on it. Taking away privileges may work better. Punishing cyber bullies by taking away internet privileges and confiscating mobile phones, or limiting computer use (maybe even moving the computer to the family room) can be more constructive. 2. Correct signs of bullying at home - Some parents may not notice that their children may have already been showing signs of aggression at home. By talking back to you or being harsh verbally and physically to siblings, your teen is showing signs of uncontrolled aggression. Making it clear that this kind of attitude towards people at home is not acceptable is very important. 3. Encourage good behavior - Catch your child while doing something good, point this out and praise him/her. If you see your teen being extra patient to a sibling, point this out to show that you see this effort and approve of it. 4. Give more responsibilities - Help your teen channel his/her energies to more useful and productive activities. During summer breaks, consider sending your child to wilderness or therapeutic camps where they will not be able to spend most of their time on the internet or on the phone but will instead be occupied with useful, character-building activities. Therapeutic camps or boarding schools also provide intensive counseling and therapy for troubled teens which will help teen bullies come to terms with whatever is causing the aggression. 5. Work with your teen's school - Discipline and punishment for teenagers who bully will be a lot more effective if you are in agreement with the school. This provides consistency and a way to monitor your child's progress when he/she is not home. Teens who bully will not change overnight. It took time to learn this kind of pattern, so it will also take time to unlearn it. Consistently modeling respect, taking your child to counseling, giving positive reinforcement and confronting bad behavior will, in time, help your teen find a better pattern that can help them become better-adjusted adults.
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