| Important Tips on Dealing With Aggressive Teenagers |
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Having an teenager at home with an extremely volatile temper can quickly escalate the stress level within the home. Dealing with aggressive teenagers may sometimes mean dealing with a physically and verbally abusive teen, and in certain cases, this could put members of the family in danger because things can spiral out of control at any time. Teens are generally moody and rebellious and often express their feelings through aggression, although parents with exceptionally aggressive teens definitely know the difference between a moody teen and a violent one. When this aggression is turned towards parents, it becomes one of the most secret kinds of domestic violence. Parents tend to be less open about this kind of family dysfunction than other kinds, probably because it's harder to admit that the child they love and have nurtured have become so uncontrollably angry that they've started physically hurting their parents. It's taking the challenge against the authority figures of the house one step further in the wrong direction. Dealing with Aggressive Teenagers It's important that parents first get themselves ready to make difficult decisions for their teens. When living with an incredibly unpredictable teenager, some things need to be done to correct this behavior, and these are not easy for anybody to do. Especially if you have little children at home, it's important for parents to understand their role as the heads of the family and protector of ALL their children, not just the one with the problem. Once your teen starts physically and verbally abusing the younger children at home, parents must do what they must to keep them safe. As much as aggressive teens need to feel the love and support of the family, the other children also need to grow up in a home where they feel safe and secure. For parents, this means that they will need to explain to their teens that if they physically or verbally abuse their siblings, they will need to leave home for a while. If this does not make a difference to their behavior, telling them that you will call the cops on them (and actually doing it at the point of uncontrolled aggression) sends a strong message. Many parents don't even want to think about involving the authorities in such family matters because they don't want their teens to get into serious trouble. For mild altercations, cops usually just show up and talk to your teen about the possible repercussions of domestic violence. It scares most teens and is a good motivator to control their anger. However, serious offenses will merit serious consequences, and even though this is one extremely difficult decision to make, it's oftentimes also the best decision if you want to keep your family safe. Dealing With an Angry Teen Aggressive teenagers are angry teens who cannot control their emotions. Different people have different ways of dealing with their anger. Some teens are more vocal about their anger. They express their anger more frequently through little gripes, acts of rebelliousness, and acting out a little. They don't get excessively angry. Other teens let their anger build up until that tipping point where a minor irritation causes them to burst and express all the pent-up emotions destructively. One of the most effective ways to deal with aggressive teenagers is to talk to them and encourage appropriate communication of their anger. Everybody gets angry, it's a normal thing to feel. However, letting this anger fill you up and cloud your judgment is another thing. It's important to talk to your teen when he/she is calm, rather than when at the height of angry emotions. Give your teens some real, specific examples of how to respond to stressful situations. You can also encourage your teen to be conscious about what triggers his/her anger. What things pushes your teen to the edge? Everybody has their own red buttons and when these buttons are pushed, the anger can be hard to control. Teach your teen to recognize the triggers and look out for physical responses to these triggers. For example, some people begin to clench their teeth when they start to get mad, or they begin to ball their fists up tight. Helping your teen recognize these triggers and physical responses can help them diffuse their own anger when they feel it coming. It's also important to know that when a teenager lives in an environment that's full of criticisms and negative attention, it strains the nerves and makes it very hard to relax and form a positive self-image. You can't expect your teen to get everything right all the time. It's more realistic to help your teen recognize the big things that you need them to improve on and take the bigger victories over the smaller ones. Hairline Triggers Some parents who deal with aggressive teenagers who seem to have a hairline trigger and are easily pushed to violence need to consider professional help. It's possible that these teens have a coexisting behavioral disorder that need to be addressed in a different way. For example, if teens have undiagnosed bipolar disorder, ODD or similar disorders, aggression is just one of the symptoms. It's also possible that the teen is depressed, going through a traumatic time in their life that they're not telling parents about, or involved in substance abuse. Parents will know best when their teens are exhibiting symptoms of being more aggressive than other teens. Early action and intervention can mean a lot for teens who need help in this area. Without the proper help and guidance, aggressive teens' family, academic, and social life will suffer greatly.
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